Thursday, April 3, 2014

Final Four March City Manager Madness

We started with 32 unqualified candidates, and now we are down to our Final Four from that group.  Many great memories and new friendships have been brought to life. "I have made peace with teams in the Blogger League and members of the At Large bracket..  I will even ride the Ferris wheel at Lemonade Days with anyone from the BigWestFarmHouzer league," said @dwoodycommunity.  StayHarris of the DHA said, "We saw a 1% bump in new memberships thanks to the feel-good vibe of the tournament."

As we preview the Final Four of March City Manager Madness it stands out that 3 of the #1 seeds have advanced to the Final Four.  "I give full credit to our selection committee.  After a couple of Guinness drafts and a some vodka/Red Bull cocktails at the Dunwoody Tavern, those two got it right.  Mr. W. and AL-TD brought me this idea, knowing only DunwoodyTalk had the experience and financial backing to pull this off with success," said Chairman DunwoodyTalk.  "Give those two a couple of hours of idle time on a stool and you'll be amazed at the results."

CVB Katie said this event was more successful than the Girlfriend Getaway promotion.  "No one puts heads in beds like DunwoodyTalk.  We expect to throw some advertising dollars their way soon." 

DunwoodyTalk has had heated discussions with the mayor of Dunwoody over the bracket.  DT, along with our thousands of followers, claims the winner here should be the actual city manager.  The mayor disagrees, for now, but is awaiting to see the outcome.  "Our new policy is to collect resumes and create a database of local residents for various positions.  The March Madness winner can apply," said the mayor.  

A stronger response came from the city's public works director.  "When this started Dunwoody had zero basketball courts and no one complained. Now we have everyone from the Dunwoody Women's Club to the Brownie troop #14581 asking for outdoor courts."  And the trouble does not end there for DT.  "He has no permits for this event.  The city needs to collect a fee for everything, and I mean everything.  He needs to pay a fee for every game, a fee for the use of our name, a fee for the police security used at every GRB game, and the Charter specifies we (the city) gets 5% of all revenue on tournaments, games of chance, games of skill, and any event involving a bracket" said Tommy DaPenny.  



GRB defeats TheOtherDunwoody (TOD)
#1 versus #2 in this Blogger League game proved to be a battle of endurance.  This was the first game in history where both teams agreed to cigar breaks every 15 minutes.  TOD played a traditional game, relying on bounce passes, back doors, and the give-n-go.  GRB is more of a street baller, playing like an out of control Big East team similar to a 1980's Georgetown or like a UNLV Runnin'Rebs squad of old.  In the end the street-baller was left standing (actually crunched over, gasping for air).  This is GRB's first Final Four appearance.  Experts from Sandy Springs and Brookhaven determined this bracket was the toughest and that the new city manager comes out of the Blogger League.
This guy picked GRB


(Not) Daughter of the Poet
Basketball Jones
I got a basketball Jones
Ever since I was a little baby
I always be dribbling.
I need help ladies and gentlemen
I need someone to set a pick for me, at the free throw line of life
I got a basketball Jones
I got a basketball Jones, baby
Danny911Ross defeats Heyward
The hottest ticket in town is Danny911Ross, all due to the failed ChatComm CAD to CAD fiasco.  "I bought a new external hard drive at NewEgg to hold all these videos I made.  I now have my own You-Tube channel.  And I will be the next City Manager.  GRB is great on the keyboard, but inside the key on the court, my post-up game is unstoppable.  When I get the ball on the block, go ahead and ring up two points" bragged Danny911. "The Dunwoody Chamber meet and greets are a great way to build relationships.  We meet monthly around the city" said Heyward.

The Danny911Ross versus GRB will be a tough match, but tough to call.  It's like LSU versus DePaul.  We think Danny911Ross has the edge.

And just in time for the Final Four, we have a new Danny911Ross Productions video.  Click at your own risk, and content is not necessarily the opinion of the Selection Committee or DT.

New Danny911Ross video:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nfWpwwzaMM



Norb ousts MengHouseTony
The fans turned out for this match.  Liberty Party ticket resellers from Cherokee County were called in to help canvas all neighborhoods in District 2 and 3, resulting in a sell-out of the Dunwoody High School gymnasium.  One half of the crowd wore freshly printed RedShirts depicting a mural-type image of MengHouseTony, the group's most recent zoning martyr.  The 2nd half of the crowd wore the traditional UN Agenda 21 shirts from InfoWar.



Team Norb



Team MengHouseTony

Norb is a force to be reckoned with in this tournament.  A grass roots beginning on the Community Council to city manager? Now that's a Cinderella story!

Captain Kingsley turns Sustainable Pattie into yesterday's compost
Sustainable Pattie burst onto the scene at the community garden at Brook Run a few years ago. "We were the OG's of da wood (Original Gardeners).  Now everyone's got a green thumb it seems. This bracket thing was okay, but it's time to turn some dirt.  Get that raised bed going and plant some more of those Ghost peppers, DT!"  Captain Kingsley entered this tournament as a #4 seed and has taken out some stiff competition in DJ Vermack, Dunwoody Talk, and now SP.  "I encourage everyone to walk to my game against Norb.  Bring a book to read during timeouts and halftime, and let's get fit.  Our next Walking Wednesday event will be on Wednesday."

Kingsley language arts teachers are team-teaching with the art teacher all week, encouraging students to support their own Captain Kingsley. DT has reached out to Princess Comet for her bio, but as we go to print, no word from her.











Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Who makes it to the March City Manager Madness Final Four?

Sustainable Pattie versus Captain Kingsley
"When push comes to shove, do you want the one who gets you across the street or the one who makes sure you eat?" That was the question posed by Sustainable Pattie today at media day as we preview the Great8 games.  Held at the Old Hickory House this morning, team representatives met with media.  "I appreciate his ability to walk to school, but can Captain Crunch grow a radish?  Does he know when to plant garlic?"  In response, an obviously irritated Captain Kingsley snapped back, "I wear a cape!  And I have my own videos over at the Kingsley school web site.  This city needs a new big toe, a new Sgt. Hulka.  I'm that guy.  As a bonus you get Princess Comet."  The latest Vegas line shows Sustainable Pattie as a 3 point favorite.  "I know DunwoodyTalk does that gardening stuff with Pattie, but it better not influence this game," said Captain Kingsley.

Norb versus MengHouseTony

This is the game that has everyone talking.  Two friends, forced to be foes.  They sit beside each other on the all-powerful Community Council and share tea at the Liberty Cafe.  But all that is behind them now.  The prize of becoming Dunwoody's next city manager is within reach, and these two men are drooling to get the big chair at city hall.  Norb is the #1 seed out of the SaveDunwoodyPac8 conference and is the favorite, but MengHouseTony may have one more surprise under his hat.

GaryRayBetz versus TheOtherDunwoody
Not since the steam car wash moved into their Mt Vernon/Chamblee Dunwoody location have we seen this much buzz around town. TOD has been busy with his own blog where he's been renaming streets and preparing fancy meals.  GRB is focused on the prize, but new data from the Cherokee Casino sports book show TOD a 2.5 point favorite.

Danny911Ross versus Heyward
Heyward has his work cut out in this battle.  Danny has been traveling back and forth from Cajun Country, learning some new tricks.  He has the newest version of FinalCutPro and ready to edit and render Heyward from the scene.  Danny favored by 5.

Our big-time sponsorship deal fell through after intense negotiations, so we are opening it back up.  We expect big blog numbers when the March City Manager Madness Final Four is announced on Thursday morning.  A typical Final Four sponsorship would ideally involve at least a large pizza and pitcher of beer, or perhaps a tub of original style chicken salad, or maybe two free breakfasts. 



The Great Eight of the March City Manager Madness

GRB defeats Chip
In our Battle of the Wordsmiths, sponsored by Merriam-Webster, we had one of the most interesting match-ups this tournament.  For those of you newer Dunwoody residents, GaryRay, aka GRB, is a Dunwoody guy relocated from Chicago.  He likes to comment on the local blogs and maintains Dunwoody's only copperhead habitat.  His poetic skills are known from here to Doraville to distant lands such as Hiram and Waycross.  He is related, we believe, to fellow blog commenter 'Daughter of the Poet' and is arch rival of 'Rob', formerly a commenter on DunwoodyPatch. Chip is yet another blog commenter, and a part-time junior editor/contributor to DunwoodyTalk.  I first met Chip at Lemonade Days, where he rode the Spaceship ride for 39 minutes consecutively.  Chip's blogosphere rivals include FarmerBob, DP Groupie, and pretty much everyone else.  Chip's actual place of residence is unknown, but we think he hails from the Snyder of Berlin family or the Snyder's of Hanover family. 

This match-up was played on a portable sport-court, hastily installed in front of Simply Thai on N Shallowford, a known Chip hotspot. The game started off with a GRB coppersnake handling routine followed by Daughter of a Poet playing God Bless America on a piano.  GRB wore his traditional uniform; a white wife-beater T-shirt (he is a kind man, we refer to the shirt style only) and cut-off denim shorts, Converse classics, topped with his  trademark red, white, and blue bandana.  Chip wore his 'home' uniform;  royal blue trunks with thin gold piping and a matching top.  Guest referee was TwoDogsTowing.

GRB defeated Chip in a tight game, 103-101, our highest score of the tournament.  

 TheOtherDunwoody advances over SDOC
TheOtherDunwoody locked up a date on the hardwood with GRB by taking care of SDOC.  TOD displayed his old-school skills, displaying his Bob Cousy style of play.  Wearing original Chuck Taylor's (mint in box condition by the way) TOD controlled all aspects of the game.  SDOC could not get her cache to refresh.  It brings to an end the run of the home-based basketball court activist.  "I'll continue to advocate for all Dunwoody residents.  I wish much success for TOD over GRB," said a calm and relaxed SDOC.  "I can now focus on things that really matter like A Taste of Dunwoody and that Butterfly and bourbon event the Nature Center does every year."

Danny911Ross defeats StayHarris
As expected, nearly every female has been eliminated from this contest as StayHarris' elimination leaves only Sustainable Pattie as the city's only possible first female Manager.  It's well known this is a men's club around here and many emailed us asking why women were even selected in the tournament.  Here's an example:


Dear Dunwoody Talk,

I like the idea of the March City Manager Madness.  It looks like something two guys drinking in a bar all afternoon would come up with.  Anyway, why are there females in it?  Do you really think a female can manage projects and parks like Brook Run?  All those sports fields and the thousands of visitors to Brook Run every weekend?  And you want a girl in charge of that or other stuff like storm water?  You're getting soft on this blog.

A once faithful reader,

Anonymous


Well, we decided to allow males and females, super heroes and non super heroes, a potato chip, journalists bloggers, and even the BP Posse.  We're not sure if Sustainable Pattie can make it to the Final Four, but females across Dunwoody wish her best of luck.

StayHarris did not have a chance in this game.  Danny911Ross compromised the JumboTron at the GA Music Hall of Fame arena and had a 'Danny' video playing during the entire game.  "Are you kidding me?  I had to listen to Otis Redding sing as a video of pine trees being mulched played.  I am filing a protest and believe me, the DHA has my back on this one," shouted StayHarris at a post-game wine tasting event.  "Back home in Louisiana, we call that tactic 'home-cooking'," laughed Danny911. 

Heyward defeats Witty
Heyward has officially won his second tournament game. equaling the number of votes at one of his District 2 precincts.  "I want to thank all my fans today, and remind you that The Dunwoody Chamber meets monthly," said Heyward.  "And I have to admit - I'm not really related to the Braves player named Heyward.  And one more thing, DunwoodyTalk earned less than 15% of the votes citywide back in 2011.  So I feel pretty good about being in the Great Eight."  Danny911Ross is reportedly hard at work on his Mac making a new video for his match against Heyward.  Witty put on a good show for the crowd and vowed to stay involved.  "I thought we had the better team, but we're okay here.  Now let's work on that independent school district issue."





Sunday, March 30, 2014

Upset Alert in March City Manager Madness

We officially have our own Valparaiso!  Captain Kingsley defeated DunwoodyTalk today, sending the host to the sidelines.  "Much of our defense is in watching the eyes of our opponents.  That mask of his shadowed his eyes a good bit.  DT was at a true disadvantage on the court today," complained a Dunwoody Talk editor.  "And he had his sidekick Princess Comet beside our bench shaking her pom poms.   It was quite distracting to say the least."
Captain Kingsley said, "I've never been late to school and I wear a cape!"  


Capt Kingsley and Princess Comet on parade after today's victory
KennyHizHonorRight was knocked off by Sustainable Pattie, setting up a showdown with fellow do-gooder Captain Kingsley. SP took advantage of her speed, rarely taking more than 20 seconds per possession.  "We play a hurry-up game, that's how Sustainable P rolls", boasted Pattie.  "Captain Crunch or whatever his name is better bring his 'A' game because I am on him like brown on quinoa."  KennyHizHonorRight was not available for comment but was seen tapping a keg over at Wyntercreek thirty minutes after the final buzzer.


MengHouseTony continues his tourney success with an old-fashioned whoopin' on JeanetteSmitty. "I am here to break up this insider network, to establish a new and improved insider network," said Tony from the Meng House press room.  "First BobbyDallasTX, then the elegant Smitty, next is my friend Norb."  
MengHouseTony at press conference following his victory

In the nightcap we saw two SaveDunwoodyPac8 powerhouses face off.  In the end it was Norb edging out @dwoodycommunity, thus ending the tournament's only outreach on Twitter.  "I applied the Delphi Technique on the court, convincing @dwoody that is was actually in his best interest to shoot the ball into my basket.  And to top it off, I then convinced him to sell his house and buy a 20% ownership in ChatComm.  I owned him today," bragged Norb.  "I don't know what happened today.  My game was off a bit, but Norb was doing this mind control garbage and I was tired from watching Anything Goes' late last night over at DHS.  And those chainsaws didn't help either," responded @dwoodycommunity.  (note: the game was played at Brook Run, thus the chainsaws).  "I'm not sure whom I want advancing between Norb and MengHouse, but I predict one of those two is our next city manager".