Thursday, April 3, 2014

Final Four March City Manager Madness

We started with 32 unqualified candidates, and now we are down to our Final Four from that group.  Many great memories and new friendships have been brought to life. "I have made peace with teams in the Blogger League and members of the At Large bracket..  I will even ride the Ferris wheel at Lemonade Days with anyone from the BigWestFarmHouzer league," said @dwoodycommunity.  StayHarris of the DHA said, "We saw a 1% bump in new memberships thanks to the feel-good vibe of the tournament."

As we preview the Final Four of March City Manager Madness it stands out that 3 of the #1 seeds have advanced to the Final Four.  "I give full credit to our selection committee.  After a couple of Guinness drafts and a some vodka/Red Bull cocktails at the Dunwoody Tavern, those two got it right.  Mr. W. and AL-TD brought me this idea, knowing only DunwoodyTalk had the experience and financial backing to pull this off with success," said Chairman DunwoodyTalk.  "Give those two a couple of hours of idle time on a stool and you'll be amazed at the results."

CVB Katie said this event was more successful than the Girlfriend Getaway promotion.  "No one puts heads in beds like DunwoodyTalk.  We expect to throw some advertising dollars their way soon." 

DunwoodyTalk has had heated discussions with the mayor of Dunwoody over the bracket.  DT, along with our thousands of followers, claims the winner here should be the actual city manager.  The mayor disagrees, for now, but is awaiting to see the outcome.  "Our new policy is to collect resumes and create a database of local residents for various positions.  The March Madness winner can apply," said the mayor.  

A stronger response came from the city's public works director.  "When this started Dunwoody had zero basketball courts and no one complained. Now we have everyone from the Dunwoody Women's Club to the Brownie troop #14581 asking for outdoor courts."  And the trouble does not end there for DT.  "He has no permits for this event.  The city needs to collect a fee for everything, and I mean everything.  He needs to pay a fee for every game, a fee for the use of our name, a fee for the police security used at every GRB game, and the Charter specifies we (the city) gets 5% of all revenue on tournaments, games of chance, games of skill, and any event involving a bracket" said Tommy DaPenny.  

GRB defeats TheOtherDunwoody (TOD)
#1 versus #2 in this Blogger League game proved to be a battle of endurance.  This was the first game in history where both teams agreed to cigar breaks every 15 minutes.  TOD played a traditional game, relying on bounce passes, back doors, and the give-n-go.  GRB is more of a street baller, playing like an out of control Big East team similar to a 1980's Georgetown or like a UNLV Runnin'Rebs squad of old.  In the end the street-baller was left standing (actually crunched over, gasping for air).  This is GRB's first Final Four appearance.  Experts from Sandy Springs and Brookhaven determined this bracket was the toughest and that the new city manager comes out of the Blogger League.
This guy picked GRB

(Not) Daughter of the Poet
Basketball Jones
I got a basketball Jones
Ever since I was a little baby
I always be dribbling.
I need help ladies and gentlemen
I need someone to set a pick for me, at the free throw line of life
I got a basketball Jones
I got a basketball Jones, baby
Danny911Ross defeats Heyward
The hottest ticket in town is Danny911Ross, all due to the failed ChatComm CAD to CAD fiasco.  "I bought a new external hard drive at NewEgg to hold all these videos I made.  I now have my own You-Tube channel.  And I will be the next City Manager.  GRB is great on the keyboard, but inside the key on the court, my post-up game is unstoppable.  When I get the ball on the block, go ahead and ring up two points" bragged Danny911. "The Dunwoody Chamber meet and greets are a great way to build relationships.  We meet monthly around the city" said Heyward.

The Danny911Ross versus GRB will be a tough match, but tough to call.  It's like LSU versus DePaul.  We think Danny911Ross has the edge.

And just in time for the Final Four, we have a new Danny911Ross Productions video.  Click at your own risk, and content is not necessarily the opinion of the Selection Committee or DT.

New Danny911Ross video:

Norb ousts MengHouseTony
The fans turned out for this match.  Liberty Party ticket resellers from Cherokee County were called in to help canvas all neighborhoods in District 2 and 3, resulting in a sell-out of the Dunwoody High School gymnasium.  One half of the crowd wore freshly printed RedShirts depicting a mural-type image of MengHouseTony, the group's most recent zoning martyr.  The 2nd half of the crowd wore the traditional UN Agenda 21 shirts from InfoWar.

Team Norb

Team MengHouseTony

Norb is a force to be reckoned with in this tournament.  A grass roots beginning on the Community Council to city manager? Now that's a Cinderella story!

Captain Kingsley turns Sustainable Pattie into yesterday's compost
Sustainable Pattie burst onto the scene at the community garden at Brook Run a few years ago. "We were the OG's of da wood (Original Gardeners).  Now everyone's got a green thumb it seems. This bracket thing was okay, but it's time to turn some dirt.  Get that raised bed going and plant some more of those Ghost peppers, DT!"  Captain Kingsley entered this tournament as a #4 seed and has taken out some stiff competition in DJ Vermack, Dunwoody Talk, and now SP.  "I encourage everyone to walk to my game against Norb.  Bring a book to read during timeouts and halftime, and let's get fit.  Our next Walking Wednesday event will be on Wednesday."

Kingsley language arts teachers are team-teaching with the art teacher all week, encouraging students to support their own Captain Kingsley. DT has reached out to Princess Comet for her bio, but as we go to print, no word from her.


Brent M said...

YES! A 1973 Cheech & Chong reference!

GaryRayBetz said...

Interesting story here - I was shamelessly swaggering in the presence of "The Daughter of the Poet", blustering and miming trimming the nets off of basketball hoops as I had advanced to the Dunwoody City Manager Final Four, this the daughter whom I hurried down to Georgia while still in her momma's womb in order that she could become an authenticated Georgian and grow up to be a bona-fide great Southern region woman writer, and the daughter who is exactly 40 years to the day my junior.

Well, this same daughter caustically remarked to me, "Well Dad, I guess you're a lock to win it all." After I curiously queried, "How so?", she explained, "Come now, you're not that naive. It's a tournament of village idiots - a Dunwoody 'Dinner for Schmucks'".

Crestfallen but still prideful, I exclaimed that may be how she sees it, then reminded her of a line from John Milton's "Paradise Lost" - "The mind is its own place and in itself can make a heaven of hell or a hell of heaven.", and proceeded to explain how this event was my heaven - a story of a working-class boy from Chicago who makes good - a regular Mike Krzyzewski redux!

I went to on to state that I intended to conduct myself with dignity throughout the remainder of the tournament whether the victory proves to reveal me to be the municipal mooncalf or not, and that upon conclusion of the games, I will buy my venerated opponents a Jameson and a Guinness back at the one or two few Dunwoody taverns that still accepts my patronage, if not my credit.

Chip said...

Gary Ray:

Take heart from these words of Cicero, as may be adapted to Daughter of the Poet.

"As I approve of a youth that has something of the old man in him, so I am no less pleased with an old man that has something of the youth. He that follows this rule may be old in body, but can never be so in mind."


Pattie Baker said...

Drats. There goes my plan for a garden at city hall, and composting buckets under all employee desks (like they actually have at L.A.'s city hall!) You think I'm kidding here?!

Oh, well. Almost time to plant tomatoes. Gotta' go. Thanks for the fun, Rick! And good luck to all, including the caped one! You deserved to win :)